


If You're Going Through Hell, Keep going

by HookerStiles



Category: teen wolf - Fandom
Genre: Always a girl Stiles, Depression, F/M, Hurt Stiles, Rape, Slow Build, Sterek endgame, Unwanted Pregnancy, attempted suicide, mentioned rape, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-24
Updated: 2014-09-06
Packaged: 2018-02-14 12:41:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2192226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HookerStiles/pseuds/HookerStiles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Stiles looked down at the little test, her heart lurching at the small “+” on the stick. She was pregnant. Inhaling shakily, she quickly turned, kneeling on the bathroom floor and leaning over the toilet bowl, emptying her stomach of what little she had managed to eat this morning.</p>
<p>She was pregnant."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Nothing Really Matters

**Author's Note:**

> //I suck at summaries, so I apologise for that. I don't actually know how long this is going to be, but it will end in Sterek. I think I tagged everything, and will be updated as and when necessary but if I missed something, please let me know. Obviously, this has ***TRIGGER WARNINGS*** for mentions of rape and suicide so if these things are triggers for you, do not read. Any comments and such are welcome (criticisms welcome, but please be polite about it) Other than that, I hope you enjoy, and I will try and update weekly :)

Stiles looked down at the little test, her heart lurching at the small “+” on the stick. She was pregnant. Inhaling shakily, she quickly turned, kneeling on the bathroom floor and leaning over the toilet bowl, emptying her stomach of what little she had managed to eat this morning.

 

She was pregnant.

 

How was she going to explain this to her dad, the Sheriff? It was bad enough she was only seventeen, but the child hadn’t been conceived consensually. It had been a secret she had been determined to keep from her dad, because there was nothing she could do. She had been at a party, she had been drinking, and at some point, someone had spiked her drink, taking her to a room to “lie down” … And when she became aware of her surroundings again, there was a guy from the lacrosse team over her, thrusting deep within her, hand over her mouth to smother any sounds of protest or distress she made. Her limbs had been too heavy to move, so she had been forced to just lie there, unable to fight back as this jock raped her.

 

No one would believe her if she told them. They would claim she had just been too drunk to remember giving her consent. But she knew she never would have, especially not with that guy. She had always felt freaked out by him, by Joshua. He had always leered at her, made lewd comments about her … Even to her. So she had made sure never to be alone near him. Until the party, when Scott had disappeared off with Allison, again. He had left her to fend for herself, and she had begun drinking.

 

Not that she blamed Scott. Never Scott. She blamed Joshua, and his inability to take no for an answer.

 

But now, there were consequences of that night. As if the nightmares weren’t enough, she now had this … _Thing_ … Growing inside her. Joshua would know … As soon as she started to show, he would know. The thought filled her with terror, imagining what he would do if anyone found out …

 

Narrowing her gaze, her resolve hardens. With everything that had happened, she had slowly been spiralling down into depression, hardly sleeping, barely managing to eat … She knew she looked like she was suffering from anorexia, she was losing focus on school work, her dad was getting in trouble again for things she had done …

 

In the darkness of her despair, there was only one thing she knew she could do to solve all the problems. Standing slowly, she turned to the bath, turning the handles to let the tub quickly fill with hot water before shifting her attention to the medicine cabinet above the sink. Hands shaking a little, she finds the sleeping pills her dad keeps for nights he really needs his sleep, and fills the small tumbler holding her toothbrush with water, setting both at the edge of the bath. Stripping, she folds her clothes neatly on the closed toilet, sending a quick mass text to the pack and her dad:

 

“I’m sorry I keep fucking up. This is the only way I know I can fix things. I love you x”

 

Before leaving the phone on top of her clothes. Turning off the water, she gingerly climbs in to the bath, sinking in until just her head is above the water. Taking a few deep breaths, she picks up the bottle of pills and the glass of water, quickly swallowing all the pills before dropping the bottle on the floor, closing her eyes as she starts to feel floaty, like she isn’t quite in the real world. The only thought keeping her from moving now is that this will stop everything from hurting. She will finally stop ruining everyone else’s lives. No more will they have to worry about poor, fragile, breakable human Stiles. They can focus on their jobs in Beacon Hills. They don’t need her, not really. They can have Lydia to do research, she is as intelligent, if not more, than Stiles anyway.

 

No one needs her … Not really …

 

And she clings to this idea as darkness starts to tinge her vision, not seeing her phone light up desperately, continuously. Not realising that someone needs her … Wants her …

 

Nothing really matters, as the darkness consumes her …


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles wakes up in hospital

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions again of rape, attempted suicide, so if these are triggers, do not read. Unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own. Comments and kudos welcome

Stiles glanced at the stark whiteness around her, frowning lightly as an odd beeping disturbed her peace. For a moment, she wondered where she was. She remembered taking some pills because … Huh … Her memory was kind of fuzzy on the why. But the incessant beeping was really getting on her nerves now. It was getting louder and louder … And with each increasing beep, the stark whiteness around her began to fade to black, panic rising in her throat. She didn’t want this peace to end. But it was fading fast and there was nothing for Stiles to cling to …

 

                                                              --- x ---

 

Slowly blinking awake, Stiles cringes away from the light threatening to blind her, groaning quietly. Suddenly, there is a flurry of movement around her, hands touching her face, a low voice murmuring.

 

“Stiles? Sweetheart? If you can hear me, can you open your eyes for me?”

 

_Melissa_ , her mind supplied.

 

Slowly opening her eyes, her vision is blurred until she focusses, Melissa’s face hovering over her, expression worried. Fingers brushed hair from her forehead, and gently grasped her wrist, checking her pulse as the rest of the world started coming into focus.

 

“How are you feeling, sweetie? You’re dads outside, he’s been here the entire time”

 

Melissa smiles down at her, softly, motherly. Stiles cleared her throat, mouth dry after … How long had she been here? Glancing around curiously, Melissa seemed to guess what was on her mind.

 

“You’ve been unconscious for nearly a week, Stiles. You were … Derek found you in your bath tub …”

 

Melissa gazes at Stiles, eyes full of worry herself. She had been on duty when Stiles was brought in. She had seen the naked girl, wrapped in a blanket, eyes non responsive, blood between her thighs, and for a moment, she had feared rape. But it was worse. After managing to resuscitate her, they ran full tests as the Sheriff paced anxiously in the waiting room.

 

What they had discovered made Melissa’s heart ache. Evidence of recent sexual trauma, pregnancy and drug overdose. If Stiles had tried to end her life, and the life inside her, she had been half successful. She was no longer pregnant. And seeing the teenager now, looking small and frail in the hospital bed, it broke her heart more to have to explain that, despite the teenager’s best efforts, they knew. They /knew/ everything. And her father was equally, if not more so, heartbroken that someone would hurt his little girl in such a way. And he was determined to get whoever hurt her, and make sure they received the full attention of the Sheriff’s department.

 

Returning her focus to the teenager, Melissa tried to smile reassuringly as she picked up a cup of water, lifting up Stiles’ head to let her wet her dry mouth. Once her thirst is quenched, Stiles gives Melissa a wobbly smile, her eyes filling with tears.

 

“Do they know? My dad … Scott … Derek? Do they know what happened? Why?”

 

Melissa sits on the edge of the bed, reaching over to take one of Stiles’ hands in her own, rubbing her thumb along the frail looking knuckles.

 

“They know. We … pieced together everything after all the test results came in. I’m so sorry sweetheart … Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

 

Stiles turns her head away for a moment, letting the few stray tears fall before turning back to Melissa. Taking a deep breath, she starts talking. About everything. About the party, her drink being spiked, waking up with … Joshua … raping her. How no one would have believed her because why would a lacrosse star look twice at her? So she had kept it to herself, hiding the nightmares from her dad. No one ever questioned why she smelled so sad and afraid all the time. Not even the werewolves.

 

The more Stiles spoke, the more Melissa became mad. Of all the people Stiles trusted the most, none of them took the time to care about the human. Once Stiles has stopped talking, tears making it hard for her to continue, Melissa gently tugs the girl into a tight hug. She would speak to the wolves herself if she had to, because no one was allowed to hurt her non-daughter. Letting the girl lie back down, Melissa tucked her in and kissed her forehead.

 

“Want me to let your father in? I know he’s anxious to see you. As are Scott and Derek …”

 

At her nod, Melissa stood, gently running her fingers through Stiles’ hair before quietly leaving the room.

 

Stepping outside, she is surrounded by the two wolves, and a furious father. Before they can bombard her with questions, she rounds on them all, eyes ablaze with a motherly fury no man can withstand.

 

“Don’t! Don’t even think about it … Any of you! You have no idea what she just told me … And none of you even noticed anything was wrong with her! Scott, you are her _best friend!_ And yet, this thing with Allison is more _important_ than her? Derek, she has save your ass so many times! And you didn’t think to check up on her, since she is the only human in your pack who gives a damn about any of you? And John Stilinski … I know you work hard, and Stiles knows it too … But she needed you. She needed all of you. But you were all too busy for her. And this was the result. She was raped by some student at a party, and she tried to take her own life, to get rid of the unwanted life inside her!”

 

The men stood awkwardly, ashamed by her words. But she was right. They had all considered other things more important, and it had hurt Stiles beyond anything they could ever have considered. John looked past her to the door, before gently moving between them and walking into his daughter’s room. He knew he had been so consumed with work. But not anymore. Closing the door quietly behind him, he walks over to her bed and sits beside her, taking her hand. Words seem to fail him as he gazes down at her. His only daughter, looking so frail and frightened.

 

"D-Daddy?"

 

Tears pricking his eyes, he hauls her up for a tight hug, broken words and whispers falling from his lips.

 

“I’m sorry Stiles, I’m so sorry … I’m sorry …”

 

Over and over, all he could do was apologise as they both collapsed against each other, tears streaming down their cheeks. Stiles clung to her dad, already forgiving him. How could she not? This was her father. She would always forgive him.

 

Clinging to him tighter, Stiles shifted her watery gaze over his shoulder, breath hitching in her throat as her gaze caught Derek’s … And held it.

 


End file.
